Affiliate Marketing for Dummies n’ Red Necks.

horse and man

That’s right. We gonna teach you dummies and Red Necks some stuff!

Affiliate Marketing for Dummies and Red Necks!

All right all you dummies and Red Necks, these here marketing lessons are for YOU!

So pay attention!

Lesson number 1

First thang is ya need what those smart folks call a computer. laptopLook at this here picture, that is a computer.

Ya ain’t gonna make no money without a computer, got that?

A computer is an “E” lectronic Device that processes information.

You can buy m at Walmart for under three hundred bucks, on sale.

It don’t really matter what brand. They all good, hear?

And buy what they call a Laptop, they better than those eye pads. Bigger too so you can see what ya write.

And no, do NOT even THINK about trying to build no website on your Apple Eye Phone!

Them letters are just TOO little to see. letters

So forget about that, put your eye phone away and use it for talking, not writing!

And stop worrying about HOW these “E” lectronic devices work.

They just do!

So stop trying to figure out why or how these computers work, they does and that is all you needs to know.

Got it?

Good.

Now, lets go on.

Ya Needs a Website

Lesson Number 2

Now I know yer a dummy and a Red Neck, not a good combination, but I hope ya at least know what this is.

Do ya?

Well, a Website is one of those here thingies that ya see on yer computer screen when ya go and click on one of those thare link thingies.

Ya got that?

No?

Too bad.

What you are reading IS directly FROM MY website, OK?, good, so that’s lesson two.

Lesson Number 3

We wants to learn ya some Affiliate Marketing cause that’s what everybody is doin, so you should too.

Does it work? Take a looks at this.

Did you looks at it?

No!? Git yer butt back up thare and click that thare link on so we can move on!

OK, that’s better.

So you see Affiliate Marketing is Working for lots of people.

So if it’s working for them, it will work for us dummies and red necks. Got it? good!

What is Affiliate Marketing?

Basically, Affiliate Marketing is when you earn a commission for recommending a product.

Someone visits your website and buys something.

You get a commission.

You do not have to make that product or keep hundreds of them in your garage.

You will not even have to collect money from them when they buy it, or ship out any products.

The company that markets the product does all of that for you.

An example would be like Amazon.

amazon logo

Ha! If you click the picture of the Amazon Logo above and go shopping, I makes a commission!

Why thank you!

Yep, and so can you, that is how it works.

I advertise for Amazon on my website.

Someone clicks the link and buys some things.

Amazon pays me a commission.

The commission rate depends on how much volume we sell for Amazon.

Yes, many makes a full time income just for selling things on their website just for Amazon alone!

But there are thousands of other companies that also will pay you when you become an associate.

Search Engine Optimization

Lesson Number 4

Would you buy a Mcdonalds and put it in the middle of the woods where only the deer and bees see it?

I know if yer a red neck you would!

But how you gonna sell any hamburgers? Deer don’t have no money!

So we need to put that Mcdonalds where a LOT of people with money can see it!

Take a look at this here red neck in front of Mcdonalds!mcdonalds sign

Yes, home boy, we talkin bout YOU.

See, the same goes with yer website. If nobody sees it, how is anybody gonna buy stuff from it?

Make sense?

No?

Figures.

Anyway, chew on that for a while.

For us to get your website in front of other dummies and red necks, we have to do what is called Search Engine Optimization.

Sorry about them big words. Lemme explain.

See, when folks goes on what is called the internet, and they wants to buy something, like say, a twelve gauge shot gun, they usually goes to google.

They type in shotgun and hit search. Then Google does it’s thing!shotgun

You see a page that has what they call results.

Most people will click on the first or second result they see on that page.

You can imagine how much traffic these people are getting to their website every day JUST because, for some reason they are on the first page of Google!

How did they get on the first page of Google?

That is what we learn you about SEO, or search engine optimization, it’s what will put YOUR website on the first page of Google.google logo

Some stuff we teaches about SEO is using what is called keywords.

Some keywords are good, and some keywords are bad.

A good key word is a key word that a lot of people search every month.

Now keep in mind, a key word is not just one word, in fact it is usually a phrase that is two to five words long.

Got that?

No?  Too bad.

We have here a tool that will figure out all the technical things about searches per month for us automatically.

It is called Jaaxy.

jaaxy

Jaaxy will find the exact keywords that you need to get your website found on Google.

Anyone Can Succeed in Affiliate Marketing!

Yea, that includes you dummies and red necks. We can learn it to ya!

So why not just take a look at where I learned it from?

They all learned me affiliate marketing from a 15-year-old company called Wealthy Affiliate.

wealthy affiliate logo

Keep your credit card in your wallet.

They don’t want yer money, not now at least. Hee hee hee.

But yea, take a look around for FREE, yea, that’s right, FREE!

Yer even gits two FREE websites just for looking around, along with over twenty free lessons on affiliate marketing.

Thank you, you dummies and red necks for reading what I gots to say.

Now go fer it!

And DON’T FORGET!!

2 thoughts on “Affiliate Marketing for Dummies n’ Red Necks.”

  1. I must commend your genuine post, and also your realism too,I have read a lot of articles on affiliate marketing and most of them just write a bunch of big grammar and forget that people with low level of knowledge may pass through and decide to read;but they would end up getting nothing.

    If I was to be a lay man there would be no way that I would understand it as It was very detailed to the level of a dummie, especially how you talked about search engine optimisation (SEO) it was amazing.

    thanks a lot,

    Regards,

    David.

    Reply

Leave a Comment